Five Tips For Sleep Training Twins

Okay parents of multiples…this ones for you!

I saw firsthand how hard it is to take care of two babies at once when my brother and sister in law had twins back in 2018. It was such a difficult first few months for them, especially when it came to sleep. For their family, establishing independent sleep was lifechanging and allowed them to truly enjoy being twin parents.

Now as a Pediatric Sleep Consultant I help twin families make this transformation! It truly never gets old, working with multiples is just extra rewarding for me. Twins often become my BEST sleepers too, totally unphased by sibling noise or an off-schedule day.

While sleep training multiples may take a little more patience and time than singletons, its totally possible to have two (or more) babies that sleep well! Here are my top tips for a smooth twin sleep training journey:

1) Remember that the sleep training “ basics” are the same!

There are no special twin methods! Sleep training can begin once your babies are 16 weeks or older (adjusted for prematurity- super important consideration as many twins are born prior to 40 weeks gestation). You can use any sleep training method you feel comfortable with- my two favorites for babies are leave and check style sleep training or a “parent sit in the room” type approach!  Be sure that you have a detailed plan for bedtime, overnight wakes, early mornings, and naps. If you are the DIY type, I do recommend writing out the steps you plan to follow ahead of time so you feel really prepared. Always start sleep training at a bedtime, and ensure all caregivers involved in your babies lives are ready to be consistent!

I also recommend ensuring your babies sleep space is cool and dark, and that you are using an age appropriate sleep schedule. Nailing the wake windows can really make sleep training so much easier- it’s extra hard for babies to find sleep in a new way when they are under or overtired. If you aren’t sure where to start with sleep scheduling check out my blog on how to find your baby’s ideal wake window here.

2) Start where you want to end up.

If your plan is to have your babies room share long term, sleep train them in that situation! I know it feels scary… what if one wakes the other?! They probably will, and that’s okay! This will allow them to become accustomed to each others noise, leading to you having two solid little sleepers. I do recommend using white noise in their sleep space to soften the impact of a crying sibling a little bit, as well as drown out environmental noise for both babies. Read more about why I love white noise here.

I do sometimes recommend a temporary separation for naps only, as daytime sleep is harder than nighttime sleep (there is no melatonin to help baby out!). If you are struggling with nap put downs or nap length try a temporary separation- putting one baby in a pack and play somewhere else would be a good option. Once naps are in order you can join them again.

3) Get your twins onto the same schedule!

I know, ALL the twin sleep blogs say this! But it’s easier said than done if you have more than one newborn right? It’s very challenging to have two newborns on the exact same schedule as each baby may have their own unique feeding needs or challenges. Don’t beat yourself up if your in the newborn trenches and haven’t managed to sync things up yet!

Once your babies are ready to learn independent sleep a synced up feeding and sleep schedule becomes way more realistic! While sleep training twins I use what I call the “15 minute rule”. What this means is that if Twin A takes only a catnap, it’s unfortunately your best bet to wake Twin B up no more than 15 minutes later. This helps us get both babies onto the same sleep schedule quickly. It may feel SO WRONG to wake up the baby who is still asleep but I promise it will be worth it! Eventually, as independent sleep skills solidify, naps will become more consistent for both babies, and you’ll be left with a matched up schedule.

4) Identify your more sensitive sleeper.

Twin parents usually know right away which of their babies is the “most sensitive” sleeper. I always recommend honoring this baby’s wake window when using the 15 minute rule. For example, Twin A wakes up from short nap at 10:30, Twin B is woken up 15 minutes later at 10:45. If Twin A is the more sensitive sleeper so we will begin the wake window at 10:30 for both babies, and put Twin A down first.

5) Allow each baby to develop their own overnight feeding patterns.

In the newborn days I highly recommend you sync up nighttime feedings when you can, waking a baby to eat if their sibling is up. This can help reduce night time wake ups for you!

Once you are ready to work on independent sleep I would stop this practice (at least temporarily!) to allow each baby the opportunity to develop their own overnight feeding patterns, and eventually sleep through the night. When we effectively establish independent sleep at bedtime its common to see night time feedings decrease on their own… waking a twin to feed when they aren’t hungry may interrupt this process for them! Once your babies each begin to sleep well with only one overnight feeding you can start syncing up the timing of it again, waking the second twin to eat with the first.

Knowing if you should keep overnight feedings, phase them out slowly, or night wean can be tricky! I recommend a chat with your pediatrician prior to beginning any sleep training, as well as taking a read of my blog on overnight feeding.

What about newborns?

I know the newborn days are INSANELY challenging if you’ve got multiples! While we can’t formally sleep train until baby is consistently producing melatonin and has developed a circadian rhythm (16 weeks!), there are some easy strategies that we can use to maximize sleep. Check out my free newborn sleep guide here!

I don’t want you to be afraid of using allllll of the sleep tools for those first few months, you are in survival mode! Nothing you do now will impact your babies sleep forever, I promise!

I love supporting families of multiples find better sleep!

Once you are ready, sleep training your twins will require some consistency and patience! It won’t be an overnight process, especially when it comes to naps. You should however see some major progress within the first week, with easier put downs and more sleep! If you aren’t seeing progress, or you just aren’t feeling confident starting DIY sleep training, I am here to help! Book a sleep evaluation call to learn more about what working together could look like for your family!